It was the longest day of the year. The previous night was a full moon night. I had only half of what I usually had for lunch. Because it was too hot, I only wanted to drink something refreshing. After lunch, I made myself a huge cup of lemonade, drink half of it with two big gulps and give the rest to my brother. His eyes were squinting as he drank it but he finished it anyway.
I washed the dishes while listening to “Spotless Mind” by ‘Island’ on repeat. Humidity probably made the speaker crackled but somehow it was fitted for my mood just like the sour lemonade was fitted for the thirst. I washed the dishes in 3 and a half song. As I put the last dishes on the rack to let dry, I felt an irresistible sleepiness incoming so I cleaned my hands and went to bed.
It was a long heavy nap with no dreams, I opened my eyes in the sound of a million cicadas calling for love. Air conditioner was off. I was probably too tired to turn it on. The bed sheet and me was covered in sweat and a thousand thoughts crossed my mind at the same time. But none of them was about her, which was a stranger thing for me when I look back.
At that moment, a realization floated amidst the cloud of thoughts. “There’s no stories, no songs or films ever that had described my feelings right now. Ever. This moment is new. Feelings are deep and ever-changing.” Suddenly I felt the staleness of forcing feelings and experiences to become words, sounds or pictures. Suddenly every story I’ve read, every song I’ve heard become dull and boring compare to the heaviness and vividness of that moment.
Some types of cicada has to wait 17 year in the ground just for one summer of love.